Update: Nova (5/?)

Title: Nova
Author: Curt Kenobi
Summary: (Yeah, trying another >_<) Love is a thing that knows no bounds. Even when following through is implausible. And love is painful. Obi-Wan knows this all, and he'll be forced to realise it.
Pairing: Anakin/Obi-Wan and Obi-Wan/Xanatos
Rating: M/R to be safe overall. (soft) R this time round.
Genre: AU, Angst, Romance, Action/Adventure
Warnings: No graphic sex, but innuendo and of course, angst
Disclaimer: Yeah, if Star Wars was mine, I could rule the world like GL. But, alas, I don't own it, so don't sue. Just call me Christian from Moulin Rouge. I'm naught but a penniless writer. Honestly.

Part One: Complicated Relations
Chapter One: Up from the Shattered...
Chapter Two: Forbidden
Chapter Three: Shadows
Chapter Four: Try to Redefine What was Known

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Chapter Four: See the Stars Fall

It felt so blissfully right...

He shivered. It was cold, though his back was slightly warm and some fabric clung to him. Fabric? He clawed up into consciousness. Fabric? He hadn't had any clothes on. The roar of the rushing waterfall did nothing to help clear his spinning mind.

But the rush of memory was vivid and intense. As swirling as his mind had been as he had been caught up in that moment. And just as disturbing to him. He hadn't any clothes on, but Xanatos deCrion still did. And he was spooned up behind him on the cold rock floor.

"Karking Sith hells," Obi-Wan spat venomously. He jumped at the warm finger that began to caress his shoulder, idly designing an invisible little pattern.

"Such a foul mouth, bratling."

"It's far better than you deserve to hear." Obi-Wan sat up and got to his feet, walking away. Xanatos sighed, throwing an arm over his eyes as he rolled over onto his back. He peeked beneath his clinging sleeve. The boy had such a delectable ass...but in attitude, he was harder to move than a bantha's.

"Why must we play these petty games, Obi-Wan?" He smirked, hiding his predator-like smile beneath his arm when he realised that he wasn't called out for the first name usage, and it widened when his own first name passed those lips.

"Because you're supposed to be dead, Xanatos! Because you're a fallen Jedi! Because you destory -- you're of the bloody Dark! You are the antithesis of everything I believe in! You --"

Xanatos had rolled over onto his side and propped up on an elbow, surreptitiously taking in Obi-Wan's form, keeping a neutral expression when the boy had whirled around, musing how the front was just as perfect as the back, if not better. But two seconds into his little love's rant, despite admiring the conviction and lilting timbre, Xanatos had grown weary. Mentally, Xanatos covered Obi-Wan's lips with a finger. "Stop, Obi-Wan." His piercing, engaging eyes held the young Jedi. He had felt the mental finger quieting him. It felt so real...

Xanatos got to his feet and came before his prey, his love. He took off his tunic as he walked. It wasn't very dry, but the boy was positively shivering before him and at least the tunic should have been warm from body heat. (Plus, it would give him a chance to see Obi-Wan in black.) He stopped a mere step before Obi-Wan. The young Jedi, captivated by the azure depths of the man before him's eyes, did not move. Xanatos flipped the tunic about Obi-Wan's shoulders with a flourish, then took the boy by his chin. Obi-Wan blinked, and Xanatos felt the quick little thrill of fear that coursed through the Jedi.

He leaned forward, so that his lips were just brushing Obi-Wan's. The ragged inhalation was sweet to the older man. He closed his eyes, nuzzling his nose briefly against Obi-Wan's before whispering, "I would never hurt you, love," against the boy's lips, the -- anguish, was that? -- coming clear in his smoky, silken voice. He sent his love through the bond they now shared. "Feel this," he entreated, words sounding a bit harsh, but only because they were insistent, because of the emotion loaded within them. "Feel this and know it, Obi-Wan Kenobi."

"You were horrible," Obi-Wan whispered back, trembling at how it felt as his lips brushed Xanatos'. "I haven't forgotten Telos...or Bandomeer."

"I couldn't have you, then. Then -- you were just a means to an end. Albeit, an end that did not come to fruition. Now, though...you're everything."

But that was exactly part of the problem. "Why, Xan? Why?" He had been all but cruel to him back on Telos five years ago. And before that, he had sent him to be a miner in a harsh, treacherous environment. And now this -- this complete one-eighty? It was so -- confusing to Obi-Wan. He had to admit that being the focus of Xanatos' affection was as unsettling as it was...an honour. But he still didn't understand why.

The incredulity of Obi-Wan's voice was as endearing as it was painful. Xanatos looked into the wide chameleon orbs, shining like the impossible grey-cast blue-green of the oceans of Avindal. He closed his own eyes, the innocence and light and confusion of Obi-Wan's like a jab from a shockstick to his chest.

"Because you are everything I never was."

There it was. Obi-Wan was stunned. Truth.

Xanatos opened his eyes, dark blue swallowing Obi-Wan. "You belong to me, Obi-Wan. You know that." It wasn't a question.

And oh, did he ever. But Obi-Wan's defiant streak shone. "I belong to no one but myself."

Xanatos laughed ruefully, stepping back, but not releasing Obi-Wan's chin. He was smiling, though. And it glinted in his eyes. Amusement. How wrong you are. And you know it, Xanatos thought, but said: "Must you always be so difficult?" Truthfully. Obi-Wan heard the request in his mind, and noted the hardening of the sapphire eyes that underlined the seriousness of it.

Truth. He was honourable; it had been given to him, he would return it. "I'd hate to think I accepted my downfall so easily."

Xanatos' smile broadened. Obi-Wan smiled himself. He liked this -- a true smile. Not a cunning smirk or cruel sneer. These smiles made Xan's eyes glow. Xan. When had he come to think of him so informally?

When I realised I didn't care what he was. That I wanted him, too.

Do you, Prince?

"Why do you call me that? 'Prince.' Why that?"

Xanatos kissed his forehead. "Little love. Still so blind. I see you, and I see all you could be, without Jedi restraints. But I have to remember that's all you know."

"Xan..."

"I'm accepting you as you are, Obi-Wan. Like you accept me?" For once, an actual question. And a tough one. But Obi-Wan...despite all he knew, he wanted to go with what he wanted for once. For him. Not everyone else. Just for him. So selfish. But if Xan was the prize, right now...he didn't care.

"Yes."

He actually felt relief roil from Xanatos deCrion at that simple admission. "Good. I call you Prince, Young One, because you are like me."

"What? Wouldn't I be your consort, then? Prince Xanatos of Telos' Nubile Plaything or that sort?" Obi-Wan grinned. Just like Obi-Wan loved Xanatos' true smiles, Xanatos enjoyed Obi-Wan's grins. They were...quirky.

"Ah, that wry humour again. I love that about you, as well. No, bratling. You're the Prince of Avindal."

"What?"

"You. If no one knew your name, those damn eyes are telling. Only the crowned family had them."

That explained the bewildered looks back in town upon his arrival. Xanatos continued.

"But Kenobi is the name of the crowned family. At least...it was until your mother was targeted for assassination and your family left the system. You and your brother were the heirs to the throne."

"How did you know about Owen?"

Xanatos smirked. "I have contacts, Young One. I can get about any information on anyone or -thing that I so wish. And I know a great deal about you, love.

"But yes, you two, if you ever came back to Avindal, could reclaim your position if you so wished. After Lyrea and Robben left with you and Owen, they decided to sort of abandon the idea of a monarchy. Not that the royal family did much. Just a throwback to a grander time, really."

"Owen hasn't come back?" Obi-Wan couldn't help the pang he felt in his chest. Was his brother here, now? Could he see him again?

"No. You all practically disappeared after you left Avindal. Records show the family lived on Naboo until you would have been about nine. After that...nothing."

Obi-Wan closed his eyes. This doesn't hurt. I'm a Jedi. The Jedi were his family. Qui-Gon was his family. Xan, now, was the one who loved him, and whom he loved. Family. They were here, the good and bad. But constant. But they weren't...

The arm around his shoulders surprised him. It dropped away as he looked up into Xanatos' dark eyes. "So, not so detached to the idea of an actual blood-family as you'd like me to believe, brat?" Xan asked.

Obi-Wan worried at his bottom lip. "I suppose. I can't go and reclaim it though, Xanatos. It's Owen's. If he ever comes back."

"So we understand each other even better. I can't reclaim Telos. Not since everyone thinks me dead, and for the disaster I've wrought."

"Are you admitting you were --"

"No. I'm just stating what I know you believe. I still think quite differently from you."

Yes, that difference. Though it was undeniable that Obi-Wan and Xanatos were right together, loved each other, they still came from different ends of the spectrum. Xan was of the Dark. Obi-Wan was of the Light. Obi-Wan was already breaking so many of the rules he lived by following this affair. Xan had lost nothing.

Just his heart to someone he can't have. Like me.

The pang that hit Obi-Wan's chest at that realisation hurt. This -- this blissful rightness -- was doomed. Perhaps that was why it was so consuming, enticing. Xanatos may have represented all that Obi-Wan held himself to be better than, but Xanatos deCrion also had that which Obi-Wan had never really known. Freedom. The ability to follow his heart, his whims. He had known it once, standing for his own beliefs on Melida/Daan. Standing for Cerasi. But that entire episode was a chapter he looked upon now with pain and shame. But still, the idea of that liberty...it was tempting.

Xanatos idly twirled Obi-Wan's padawan braid. "Mine was about this length when I left. Never liked the damned thing much. Not when it meant I had to keep my hair cut short."

Obi-Wan would have laughed at the reminesence if he hadn't felt so bad. For Xan. For himself. For them both together. He watched Xanatos twist the braid between his fingers. Xan tickled the bottom of Obi-Wan's chin with the end of his Padawan braid. Caressed it down his cheek, down the side of his neck to trace down the middle of his chest and then swirl lightly around a nipple. Obi-Wan inhaled shakily.

"I have twelve days."

Xanatos let the braid fall from his hand. He looked into Obi-Wan's eyes. "You could have forever." The crooked smile was half-hearted, forced. He knew it was futile.

"I have twelve days, Xan," Obi-Wan reiterated.

Xanatos looked away. It's not right. You're mine. I love you. I should keep you.

You know that you can't. Regardless of if I thought I want to or not. I know you won't.

How are you so sure? I'm evil, remember.

Obi-Wan smiled. Humour from Xan, tainted with truth. He touched Xanatos' cheek, cupping his hand, smoothing his thumb across the skin, feeling the raised skin of the broken circle scar. You're human. You love me. Therefore you'll let me go.

Xanatos brought his face back to Obi-Wan. His eyes glowed like the hottest part of a flame with conviction. I'll hate them more.

Then I'd have to hate you again. Do you want that?

"Blast, little love. You've talked me into a corner." Xanatos was a bit amazed. He slipped his hand into Obi-Wan's free one, their fingers lacing together. He tightened his grip briefly and kissed Obi-Wan. "You're freezing. Let's go get you into your clothes, for what it's worth." He nipped the top of Obi-Wan's ear before whispering, "They're coming right back off when we get back to your room."

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He hadn't made an idle promise. No sooner had they gotten into the door of Obi-Wan's room than Xanatos slammed it shut and shot the bolt home with the Force, locking it, as he divested Obi-Wan of his tunic while at the same time he kept the boy walking backwards toward the bed. Obi-Wan's knees bumped the side as his tunic went sailing off across the room. He stopped Xanatos' hand on his utility belt. Xan's surprised eyes met his.

"No. This'll be twice I've been the one undressed. No."

Xan cut him a look, but couldn't help the smirk. He liked this change in events. His eyes widened when his own sash fell from him. The boy hadn't even moved.

"Isn't that against your precious Code, Young Love?"

"You're against my 'precious' Code, Xan, and you know it," Obi-Wan replied, pushing the still-damp shimmersilk from Xanatos' shoulders as he leaned in to kiss the older man, hard. Twelve days. He had to make the most of it.

Xanatos groaned and leaned into it. He shivered as the cool air of the room hit his now-bare skin, and bit his lip as a little mewl issued forth as Obi-Wan pulled away. He felt the change in the boy.

"Not nervous now after that wonderful display a moment ago, are you, love?"

"N -- no." Even if he hadn't stammered, the denial come too quickly. Xanatos sighed. He toed off his boots, kicking them over to where Obi-Wan had dropped his (he'd carried his on the way back.) He stepped in close to Obi-Wan again, and framed the almost-angelic face with callused hands. His hands then slid down to follow the boy's shoulders and down his sides to finally grasp his ass as Xanatos leaned in to kiss him.

"So tell me, Obi-Wan," he whispered in the boy's ear, savouring the delightful little moans Obi-Wan was making as their hips ground together. The electric bolt it sent through Xanatos' own frame was intense, and he grasped Obi-Wan bruisingly by the hips to still him.

"Xan..."

"Tell me, Obi-Wan," Xanatos said, picking up his original thought. "How many times have you done this?"

It was plausible to imagine that he had run the boy through with his lightsabre. Obi-Wan stood suddenly still, and his already blushing skin flamed red at the cheeks. He hadn't. He'd never gotten to actual sex. His cheeks flushed brighter, ears flaming, too. Xanatos looked almost sympathetic, a hand gentling his little love.

"We -- we, uh, hadn't gotten...gotten that" -- the boy swallowed hard -- "far."

The smile slid across Xan's face, one side of his mouth curling before the lips parted, flashing white and predatorial. Mine. Obi-Wan heard his thoughts clear: Mine to take. He shivered. There was a Dark current in the air, underlying the lust. It was...scary. It was...intoxicating. Part of him wanted Xan to do what he would. Part of him was terrified that that was exactly what Xan would do.

Xan nipped at Obi-Wan's neck as he undid the tie on the young Jedi's leggings and let them fall to the floor. Obi-Wan gasped and Xan stepped back as his own black pants fell. He looked up through a curtain of dark hair, one eyebrow arching, to see Obi-Wan smirking cheekily. He straightened and caught Obi-Wan by the chin. Again, that thrill of fear that shot through the boy. He was scared of him.

Obi-Wan noted the slight change in Xan's eyes. "What?"

"Nothing." The boy was afraid of him. He didn't care, but he had thought that if he truly loved him as he professed, that wouldn't be a matter. Alas, it was, for the same reason they would part. Damn the Jedi and their poisonous teachings.

"So, little love," Xan smoothly changed the subject. "I suppose I must initiate you, then."

The smoky, husky roughness of Xanatos' voice, the cool air on his hot, hot skin, Xanatos revealed before him in all his beautiful glory -- porcelain-coloured skin, smooth chest, the thin line of black that led from navel down... With a moan, Obi-Wan dragged his eyes back up before he was truly lost -- he was too close as it was. The glint in Xanatos' eyes was almost malicious, and Obi-Wan pushed away the unease he felt. Obi-Wan took a deep breath.

"Okay, then. Teach."

Another wicked smile twisted Xanatos' mouth, and Xan, with a growl Obi-Wan half-expected of him, advanced on him, kissing him brutally and pushing into him, letting them both fall to the bed.

Xanatos' underlying furiosity unnerved him, and the Dark aura which surrounded him more than made the young Jedi skittish, but Xanatos' intensity also ensnared him. And in the end, as he lay glistening and sated and wonderfully sore, Xanatos' heavy, comfortable weight on top of him, Obi-Wan couldn't have cared less. He was awash in the supernova this moment was.

All that he had shied away from he now embraced. Just for now.

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(The lyrics in the page break are from "Driven Under" by Seether.)

--> To Chapter Six: Wrongs Begin to Right